Good Stuff #1: HUSBAND

1 Jul

I have a single friend who recently revealed that she is thinking about having a baby via a sperm bank donation.   At the time she told me, I was still pregnant.  I hadn’t yet experienced any of parenthood’s highs and lows. I think my response to her at the time was nothing more than a hearty good luck and a smile.

Just two weeks into motherhood, though, I called her up and had her come over under the guise of showing off the baby.  My real motive, however, was to exhort her not to go forward with the sperm bank plan.  And why?  Because having a baby without a father is downright kamikaze.

Although I’ve always believed that children need the love and security of both a mom and a dad, practically speaking, if it weren’t for the love and security Jake has shown toward me, lil Seabass may have ended up on someone’s doorstep by now.

Hyperbole, of course.  Mostly.

I’ve had Seabass alone during the day for about three weeks now, and I can’t describe the sense of relief I have when Jake comes home from work.  The sound of his key in the lock at 5:30pm heralds the first full breath I take all day.  It means that the baby will calm down in new, different arms and hear a new, lower voice.  It means there will be fresh energy restored to our home.  It means there will be a shoulder to cry on when I’m bouncing on the exercise ball and trying to breastfeed but Seabass just refuses to eat.  And it means there will be new ideas to try when every response to “WHAT NOW?!?” has been worn to the nub.

So, I gave my whole opinion to my crazy friend, half expecting her to look at me askance and ask when I’d become June Cleaver.  But she didn’t.  She sincerely thanked me for the tip.

It may have had something to do with the fussy, grunting, back-arching Seabass in my arms.  Just a guess.

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6 Responses to “Good Stuff #1: HUSBAND”

  1. christine July 1, 2010 at 7:12 pm #

    so – he’s not as peaceful & relaxed as his pictures? he must be a “ham” in front of the camera. Perhaps you should set up a camera on a tripod so he will demonstrate his “better behavior” for more hours during the day…
    not having met “C” I don’t have any suggestions? what advise does your mom recommend?

  2. Debbie July 1, 2010 at 7:27 pm #

    I recognize that shirt. I will have to look through my pictures & see if I can find one of Jake in it

  3. Sara Nesper July 1, 2010 at 8:10 pm #

    I LOVE that you have a blog!!! I love the way you write and being able to read about what’s going on with the family.

  4. Jim July 21, 2010 at 1:35 pm #

    Congratulations! on the precious baby.

    I’ve only read a few of your posts but enjoy your writing style. It is apparent that parenting is important to you and your husband.

    I noticed “Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child” on your blog roll. My wife and I used that book too and believe that helping our children get sufficient sleep has made a big difference throughout their lives in terms of health, behavior, and education.

    Your Seabass is a lucky baby boy. Best wishes to you and your husband on your parenting adventures!

  5. Hartini July 21, 2010 at 6:01 pm #

    Hey I feel you! I felt the exact same way when I was a stay-at-home mummy for the first 6 months of my son’s life. I will call and bother my husband as to what time he’s coming home! Soldier on, new mummy! Things will get better, I promise! My son is almost 9 months now and it’s been an incredible journey getting to know him…

  6. Tara Dee December 10, 2010 at 2:08 pm #

    I completely agree with you..i share the same values as you when it comes to having the husband around, it is a team effort and there is no “i” in team especially when the little one comes along.

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